Name: Meinertzhagen's Haversack
Released: 2017-04-25
Cast: Thomas Middleditch, T.J. Miller, Josh Brener, Matt Ross

1) heist

It's a 2001 casino heist film, starring Julia Roberts and 11 men.
2) badass

He said, "Avast, ye fellow badass,
3) swag

More recruiter swag?
4) serendipity

But I was only referring to the serendipity of the coincidence.
5) deliverable

I can generate fake status reports, purchase orders, deliverable updates,
6) weasel

we also have to make Jack and his sales weasel think
7) campfire

Guys, I hate to keep shitting on your campfire,
8) cheddar

- You're leaving me with the cheddar? - That's right. Dick.
9) pun

It's a pun. It signifies that at Raviga, we ask the big, hairy questions.
10) caramel

Don't eat the caramel. You can have the cheese or the plain.
11) launcher

Hey, can I have that USB missile launcher?
12) bullshit

with some freeform jazz odyssey of masturbatory bullshit,
13) insult

Dinesh, I have a few premium chain insult
14) mole

You see these fucking mole people?
15) maze

Let the rats run in their maze.
16) deception

Well, it's a principle of military deception.
17) recruiter

Already? Recruiters move fast these days.
18) paperwork

Well, there's actually some paperwork involved.

1) extort

DINESH: We just got extort for $20,000.
2) harass

Oh, and damages from when Jared sexually harass me
3) pertain

that pertain to skunkworks. If anyone catches wind
4) proclaim

You publicly proclaim, "I have to go over Barker's head
5) owe

Here's the deal. I'm going to need the back pay you guys owe me
6) bust

Great. Now even fucking Jared is bust my balls.
7) steal

You stole half of our algorithm.
8) dig

You guys are fucking nuts, but I dig it.
9) arrest

he could take our stock and probably have us arrest.
10) pitch

I pitch it as an example of what not to do and the fucking sales guys ran with it.
11) quit

By saying the words "I" and "quit" in conjunction together, i.e., "I quit."
12) involve

Well, there's actually some paperwork involve.
13) suppose

- I'm suppose to give you this. - Pappy Van Winkle.
14) shoot

he goes out and buys a gun and shoot everyone in a bank.
15) appreciate

Great. I really appreciate you hearing me out on this.
16) promise

Your sales representative promise 24-hour-a-day, on-site maintenance,
17) pull

When I pull a little bit of power
18) teach

Yes, I did. And now they teach it at business schools.

1) sexually

Oh, and damages from when Jared sexually harassed me
2) differently

If we do anything differently, Barker's going to be onto us.
3) literally

- You can't make that shit up. - But you literally did make it up.
4) essentially

Essentially, it means you have to continue to act the part.
5) basically

So, basically, we are a fucking mediocre appliance company.
6) obviously

Not for myself, obviously, but for the team.
7) apparently

harvested, apparently, from dead people in India.
8) definitely

- I definitely would've noticed. - Okay, listen.
9) unfortunately

Richard, unfortunately, in this case, I think we have to roll over and take it.
10) possibly

Just to be as clear as I possibly can be here,
11) absolutely

What? That he had absolutely no idea
12) exactly

Sorry. Why, exactly, would we need to be here?
13) immediately

In fact, it was her opinion that we should immediately abandon the box
14) alone

Can I speak with you alone, please?
15) perhaps

Perhaps you can go into slightly more detail?
16) behind

did he just roll over and take it from behind?
17) recently

who, until very recently, headed up engineering at Nucleus?
18) actually

Actually, you know what?

1) artless

That box is artless commerce. I won't be a party to it.
2) uninspired

an uninspired application of your technology.
3) freeform

with some freeform jazz odyssey of masturbatory bullshit,
4) adamant

Exactly. She was pretty adamant
5) legit

And you are too legit to quit, eh, MC Hamas?
6) dormant

sad stacks of server components lying dormant in storage.
7) mediocre

So, basically, we are a fucking mediocre appliance company.
8) jealous

You're just jealous I have a salary, quitter.
9) insane

- All right, I'm in. - Well, you're insane.
10) fake

I can generate fake status reports, purchase orders, deliverables updates,
11) sad

sad stacks of server components lying dormant in storage.
12) okay

(SIGHS) okay-
13) mad

I don't know what you're mad about.
14) fellow

He said, "Avast, ye fellow badasses,
15) dear

The toilet, dear. That's okay.
16) experienced

Firing a young CEO and installing a much more experienced one
17) backup

that a backup appliance for data centers seems
18) secret

A secret company inside the company.

Silicon Valley » Season 3 » Meinertzhagen's Haversack