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Master of None » Season 1 » Mornings

00:26:41

Aziz Ansari, Eric Wareheim, Lena Waithe

25

Words to remember

Nouns

1) veg

I even made a veg version for you.
2) plank

I'm gonna hold a plank pose-- ah-- for 30 seconds.
3) tummy

Hey, tuck your tummy, man.
4) bullshit

Okay, don't try and save yourself with those bullshit phrases.
5) spaghetti

I made us spaghetti carbonara.
6) jukebox

And she was standing at this jukebox,
7) boo

Oh, okay, well, clean boo, you left all the glasses
8) asshole

You don't have to be an asshole about it.
9) wedge

No, it's a firm wedge so we can get different angles.
10) dues

But sometimes you have to pay your dues
11) bump

Bumps is what I called my butt when I was a little boo.
12) fireplace

One, two, three. Say, "Stuck in the fireplace."
13) pasta

A pasta maker? I love it!

Verbs

1) mismanage

Wait, so you think that I'm mismanaging my time?
2) liberate

Great. Well, now I'm liberate from back pain.
3) shove

How about you stop rubbing your eye every time you shove your junk in me?
4) squeeze

-You squeeze it from the top? -Yeah.
5) spill

and spill Campari on the kitchen counter.
6) smell

It smell really good in here.
7) fold

She fold them up. That doesn't count.
8) suppose

but what am I suppose to do?
9) throw

and then when it doesn't come out anymore, I throw it away.
10) catch

If you catch any of my clothes on the floor or on the chair,
11) push

Hey, my conference call got push.
12) decide

That's like the kind of tone people use when they've decide
13) happen

Yeah, it happen.

Adverbs

1) artistically

How artistically fulfilling is that?
2) theoretically

theoretically rather have a clean floor than me blow you,
3) abroad

She just wanted to live abroad for a little while.
4) apparently

that I don't care about, apparently.
5) eventually

and eventually, they went home together,
6) sometimes

Okay, well, sometimes my contacts get dried, okay?
7) fucking

and, what, and I fucking hate my life?
8) instead

instead of this one that I chose for no reason.
9) quite

Thank you. I'm quite proud of my bumps.
10) almost

Dev, we've been dating for almost a year!
11) actually

Yeah. That'd be actually really nice.
12) kind

I kind of changed my mind, and I think you should leave,
13) later

Great. All right, see you later.

Adjectives

1) distracting

It's distracting.
2) insensitive

but you're being really insensitive about it.
3) respectful

you should be respectful of my place
4) ashamed

But it just makes me feel like you're ashamed of me
5) awkward

If it's awkward, I don't want to make you do anything
6) racist

so you're a racist boo and a dirty boo.
7) asleep

I'll just chop their head off when they're asleep."
8) insane

That was insane.
9) dumb

and work on some more dumb shit
10) intimate

an intimate conversation with Beatrice.
11) intense

Yeah, six months would have been pretty intense.
12) strict

Babeland has a very strict return policy
13) offensive

it's very offensive,

Next episode

Finale

18 January 2018

25