New here? Create a new Account
Move to the previous cue
Move to the next cue
Increase size of captions
Decrease size of captions
Translate current cue
00:22:00
Josh Radnor, Jason Segel, Cobie Smulders
899
Um... oh! The green testicle story. So I was playing ultimate frisbee in college
Yeah, all this granola business, it was just a phase.
Um... oh! The green testicle story. So I was playing ultimate frisbee in college
I thought you were vomit-free since '93.
I could be cooped up in some tiny apartment changing some brat's poopy diapers.
However, could we skip the traditional interrogation of the new girlfriend tonight?
Will an eagle ever soar through this tempest of woe?
But here's the real kicker:
Ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh.
Really? Well, 'cause she gave me a videotape to give...
No. Backgammon sucks.
We just earned a huge chunk of story.
Mellow order, bro, mellow order.
There's a thief in the palace, she's stolen all my love
a squeeze-bottle of marshmallow ice cream topping,
Grab that afghan your mom made.
I was stopping by Lily's kindergarten class to say hi,
If only I'd given you a fake tape and hidden the real tape in my purse.
And I rediscover just how awesomely awesome my life is.
No. I-I swore you to secrecy on that.
Understandably, she freak out and I left.
There's a thief in the palace, she's stolen all my love
Ooh, I am smell dirt. What is the story of the re-return?
After Shannon and I talked, I nail her.
and I left the rest of it in the trash where it belong.
Victoria, "Have you ever cheat while in a relationship?"
Okay, it involve a game of truth or dare,
You ralph and ran?
Though you kind of ruined my customize Scherbotsky doormat.
As I walked away, I realize Shannon was an adult.
I wish I'd pull up my pants.
She and Greg dated for a while and then split up.
And FYI, Shannon and I have decide to wait till we're married.
Don't tell me you've forgotten.
We spend so much effort trying to keep parts of our lives hidden,
It was the most embarrassing, and humiliating thing that ever happen to me.
Understandably, she freaked out and I left.
Backgammon, obviously.
Well, I will definitely give Marshall a kiss for you.
But unfortunately, the night did not end there.
And guys, I haven't exactly told Victoria that I used to have a kind of thing for Robin,
Sometimes it's good to-to talk about it.
We all finally agreed Marshall should be running our game nights
instead of playing in them.
Barney, I actually like Victoria... a lot,
but a while back, I was kind of into Robin.
Look, he's coming by soon to talk about it, but
Five weeks later, we were all set to leave for the Peace Corps.
Don't worry, though, it wasn't that great.
Well, we're not quitting just 'cause Ted's so far ahead.
We fast-forward eight years into the future.
What about us changing the world together?
Wait... What if somebody else told their most humiliating story?
and remember, if you ever ask the question "What?", then...
Hey, nonfat latte to go.
Mellow order, bro, mellow order.
It was the most embarrassing, and humiliating thing that ever happened to me.
and there was this barefoot dude with weirdly sharp toenails...
And it just seemed insane that you didn't know who I am now.
a profound moment of doubt about yourself and...
She was in the middle of a heated argument with her dad.
Thank you so much for the delicious cookies.
Kids, I tell you a lot of inappropriate stories,
I'm so excited Victoria's coming.
If only I'd given you a fake tape and hidden the real tape in my purse.
Yeah, you were acting so weird about it, I gave you Ted's graduation tape instead.
So, are you going to be okay hanging out with Victoria tonight?
I mean, I know judge not lest ye be judged, but gross!
and there was this barefoot dude with weirdly sharp toenails...
Sounds reasonable.
it's amazing how minor those secrets all end up seeming.
But those rare times when we do open up,