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00:56:20
Taylor Schilling, Danielle Brooks, Taryn Manning
228
If you wanna skip that shower line, do the 5:00 a.m. or the 5:00 p.m.
If you wanna skip that shower line, do the 5:00 a.m. or the 5:00 p.m.
"Dis go here. Dat go there. Dis how you be wipin' your bunghole."
because I don't need chipmunk or roaches in here
Gooble gobble. Gooble gobble.
I don't tolerate foolishness in my bunk. Understand?
Then some purple kale, Uncle Eddie's vegan cookies.
- But I tell you what, grasshopper. - (DOOR CLOSES)
my testes were removed,
ALEX: They took my moisturizer, guys. I had to walk through the airport barefoot.
Yeah. Welder chick taught me.
If it made it down your esophagus, it should travel the rest of the way.
It's the fucking pheromone, man.
I work for an international drug cartel.
And, uh, well, then I got some heirloom tomatoes.
Hot flashes, night sweats. My face will sag, my body hair will start to grow back.
trying to get their Cup O' Noodles on,
Oh, sweetie, I'm sorry.
Thirteen people were indict.
Your ass? I'm juggling vendor changes, staff reductions.
I'm reliving my youth. I'm 14 again.
Ugh, thank God. I'm starving.
Unfortunately, you have elevate levels of AST and ALT,
Warren just informed me that you'd like to be bunk together.
It's where you jerk off, okay?
It's got one melt plastic eye.
You owe me. I wanted alone time with you.
You never ever forgave me for leaving.
My cock is hard. And I'm rub it against your ass.
If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appoint for you.
I warn you about this when you first came in.
Dandelion, she bother you?
You stole my life.
That smell good to you?
Wait, you got assign?
She'll see what she be mess with.
Monumentally bad. Monumental pain in my ass.
Ya'll gonna have to do your swirl someplace else.
ALEX: They took my moisturizer, guys. I had to walk through the airport barefoot.
in the middle of nowhere?
Occasionally, a Russian hooker comes through,
Besides, she used to have a dick,
Honestly, it's just gonna end up in a drawer somewhere, so...
(SIGHS) You okay, Pipes?
Unfortunately, you have elevated levels of AST and ALT,
No! Absolutely not.
to truly bat-shit bananas.
But she's extremely persistent.
That's exactly what I need right now. A reminder of my ebbing fertility.
- You can't leave me alone with my mother. - (SOBBING) I know, I know.
'cause sometimes they strap them up with explosives
I bet it's fucking perfect.
Finally.
Especially if you got writer's block.
They're just full of crazy. It's terrifying.
Monumentally bad. Monumental pain in my ass.
If it were up to me, I'd take all the butch ones
No sleeping all day 'cause it's depressing.
And I don't know what busted-ass country you come from,
When my penis was split in half and inverted,
MAN OVER PA: Inmate Stuart, report to inmate work station two.
Likes the whole "I'm risky" thing.
Then some purple kale, Uncle Eddie's vegan cookies.
Then I got, um, you know, those bulk roasted almonds.
And there's a skinny bitch in my pre-natal yoga,
You know, maybe I was unclear,
She's volatile, that one. She was removed from the puppy program.
you remember every rude thing she says, all right?
But she's extremely persistent.
Well, hey, maybe you'll get lucky and go bald everywhere but in the tits like Rosa.
Why the sudden interest?
I'd chop off their hands before I'd let them get rid of their baby makers.