Name: The Empty Chair
Released: 2017-04-25
Cast: Thomas Middleditch, T.J. Miller, Josh Brener, Matt Ross

1) etti

'cause it's Bachman from him and then the "etti" from me.
2) muckraker

No. I do not want you to engage with a muckraker like C.J. Cantwell
3) simpleton

But he is a bit of a simpleton, and his name's fucking Big Head.
4) mettle

- He's shown mettle. - Mmm-hmm. Definitely.
5) cursive

This one's in cursive, this one's just printed, and then I...
6) behemoth

Ms. Cantwell, what say you to an exclusive on the launch of a future financial behemoth?
7) bugle

"Rise up-for you the flag is flung for you the bugle trills."
8) retainer

I found my retainer in the school dumpster.
9) limbo

and every day we sit in limbo like this...
10) slime

Crawling all over our garbage, leaving their slime of mediocrity.
11) cto

That's right. You're the CTO. Technically, you're the ranking officer.
12) waffle

- So, no more surprise waffle. - What?
13) severance

On top of Jack's ridiculous severance package,
14) unicorn

"be turning Pied Piper from a unicorn into a donkey wearing a party hat?"
15) disagreement

In the event of a tie vote, any disagreement shall be settled
16) urn

Oh, yeah. Urn, it's just my business manager had some questions
17) militia

I found my biological father in a militia up in the Ozarks.
18) paw

haggling, selling your monkey paw,

1) gallivant

that Laurie Bream is out there gallivant around the Valley,
2) trill

"Rise up-for you the flag is flung for you the bugle trill."
3) pave

and that road must be pave with trust. Blind trust.
4) insult

and it insult my honor.
5) impress

I have been impress by his conduct in a tough situation.
6) scrub

No, no, no. Did you just say Gavin Belson scrub the Internet?
7) perceive

Widely perceive as a racist,
8) groom

Be showered, groom, well-dressed.
9) insist

Oh, really. Hard to see why Laurie insist on a PR rep for you.
10) rub

And it has a lot less of Barker's ass rub all over it.
11) spill

I spill coffee on it.
12) terminate

terminate immediately.
13) spike

Your story's spike. Great, okay.
14) settle

In the event of a tie vote, any disagreement shall be settle
15) deserve

That's my job. I deserve it.
16) shake

Traditionally, the offender shake the offendee's hand,
17) organize

I've organize a lot of estate sales, so this is kind of my wheelhouse.
18) hang

Then I said no, and then we both hung up.

1) publically

I am meeting publically with a number of high-value candidates
2) favorably

with whom Richard compares favorably.
3) upfront

Right? We get $2 million upfront to get us going,
4) technically

That's right. You're the CTO. Technically, you're the ranking officer.
5) aboard

- Welcome aboard. - ENGINEERS: Hi.
6) privately

and spoken to you privately about staying on, that does mean that you are
7) legally

Are you sure that you can fire us, like, legally?
8) essentially

was to essentially pick the wrong product and then bleed the company dry.
9) aside

And what that means is, if I haven't taken you aside
10) besides

And besides, like you, I'm giving up everything else I have of value,
11) apparently

Because, apparently, Jack's empty fucking chair
12) possibly

You're looking at the past, present, and possibly future CEO of Pied Piper.
13) effectively

Yes. So we are effectively a $250 million company
14) absolutely

Yeah. Yes, absolutely.
15) slow

Slow down. Listen to me. Look, in my defense,
16) indeed

Why indeed?
17) exactly

to meet with a PR person to tell me exactly what to say
18) earlier

Oh, that's weird. I saw him earlier.

1) perspicacious

and his perspicacious skewering of evangelicals is laudable.
2) vaunted

"Could the vaunted tech of founder Richard Hendricks,
3) expedient

Yes. You see, Richard must not be perceived as being the most expedient candidate.
4) mediocre

Well, Code/Rag said that your tech is mediocre
5) drunken

Give me something better. I don't know, go on a drunken racist Twitter rant,
6) fragile

Yeah, and I have a fragile posterior.
7) racist

Give me something better. I don't know, go on a drunken racist Twitter rant,
8) ridiculous

On top of Jack's ridiculous severance package,
9) unfair

It would be unfair to you, and to me, and to them
10) brave

Well, Big Head, it takes a brave man to admit his mistakes,
11) slight

So, slight hiccup. I tracked down the woman who bought the drive,
12) rid

which was next to all the hard drives we got rid of?
13) bare

Now everything looks so bare.
14) ripe

I've got a fresh and juicy that's ripe for the picking.
15) unavailable

I know to be unavailable,
16) surprised

Why am I not surprised?
17) weird

That was weird.
18) sad

Yeah. There is a certain sad vulnerability to it.

Silicon Valley » Season 3 » The Empty Chair