New here? Create a new Account
Move to the previous cue
Move to the next cue
Increase size of captions
Decrease size of captions
Translate current cue
00:22:07
Jason Ritter, Alex Hirsch, Kristen Schaal
1262
a new crime he invented called "burgle-bezzlement,"
I can't sleep because my cellmate took my pillow for a wife!
Do I really want "crooked grifter" on my tombstone?
and the Friday Debate, wherein townsfolk throw bird seed
I eat the same slop every day!
a forgettable blip in human history.
DIPPER: Dear Stan, I took these
they'll hit the plunger for the fireworks display,
You'll never get away with this, you creepy little dork!
my candidacy for the mayor of Gravity Falls!
That llama knew too much.
Hey hey! Vandalism! Yay!!!
the Wednesday Stump Speech, held on an actual stump,
24-hour news and bear rampage alerts.
This is a minor setback, but we'll win,
First-degree thermometer theft, pug trafficking--
and putting town menace Gideon Gleeful behind bars--
Everyone in this town is a tad strange,
Oh, but I have a widdle twick up my sweevie-weeves.
A memorial statue is already being carve
and the light it emit makes your skin softer.
Oh, we were. So I invent my own.
Ew! I'd rather die, you creep!
Well, now, I do believe I fulfill all the requirements.
I propose we stimulate the economy
I've been trap behind concrete all summer--
Awright, I lie. She's kind of mannish.
Well, TV, at least you appreciate me. Give me the good news.
you might not like the Gravity Falls you wake up in.
considering we threw his son in jail.
If it wasn't for this tie, you'd be losing!
Guys! Something weird just happen.
I guess this is my life now.
I eat the same slop every day!
As long as you wear the matching one,
and make 'em fight for dominance.
Since when has Bud been creepily adorable?
And ethically ambiguous!
Yes, yes. Use it responsibly and all.
except, ironically, Tad Strange.
You may know me as that guy who accidentally let all those bees loose
but I'd like to make up for it by formally announcing
Gideon! I knew you were somehow behind this!
Besides, Stan has a kind of charisma.
but Bud's definitely up to something,
possibly starting World War I,
That is exactly what I needed to hear right now!
Everyone in this town is finally showing me respect--
We're here to choose a mayor for the first time in almost a century.
the only candidate who actually filled our their paperwork,
Awright, I lied. She's kind of mannish.
trapping you all inside.
Kids, you were right all along.
Ha ha. Seriously, though,
someone totally suggestible,
a forgettable blip in human history.
I'll finally rule this backwoods town!
Kids! Look, I'm sorry I was being stubborn.
Do I really want "crooked grifter" on my tombstone?
And ethically ambiguous!
Since when has Bud been creepily adorable?
ANNOUNCER: In a shocking turn of events,
On an unrelated topic, I have a lot of cheap pugs,
You're making me very uncomfortable right now.
in the deceased mayor's honor.
and you can make him a literal talking head.
Despite winning an overwhelming 95% of the vote,
My dumb brother's research is probably gonna make him famous,
♪ I got the fancy moves and a bad attitude ♪
Guys! Something weird just happened.
Ahh. Rough start to a day,
You may know me as that guy who accidentally let all those bees loose