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00:21:00
Sofía Vergara, Ed O'Neill, Julie Bowen
182
It's just, if I'm sick, I might get the chaperone sick.
like that limping gazelle at the watering hole that the alligator knows to eat.
Even my reputation can't handle that dork hit.
You know..."We all have insecurities. You've gotta be brave here."
Especially that receptionist Heather. Right, buddy?
sending us a message from her stripper pole.
You wear blazer to school. You play the pan flute.
If you're both going out, who's taking me to cello?
- Who needs a shrink now?
I've seen vine climb walls faster than that. Move your butt.
Oh, there's your esteem-building parent right there.
There's tons of soda in there.
- Shaving cream in her locker? - Just stand over there and yell if someone's coming.
buy her a new outfit, get her some hair rings.
- And then there's the crazy aunt and the frozen cows. - Oh, please.
except for a tiny notation in your calendar?
No way. She plays lacrosse and takes cello lessons.
Excuse me, Sherpa. Could you assist me with the harness?
Honey, we need to go down to the police station. Our daughters just vandalize the school.
I worry. I think about a tiny little thing, and then I obsess on it...
What, so she gets kidnap and I get in trouble? No, thank you.
- You don't like? - Of course not. You puncture our daughter.
like that limp gazelle at the watering hole that the alligator knows to eat.
You ditch a class?
Phil, I already apologize. It just came out wrong.
So Cam and I have been revising our will...
So you shout.
- What I told you. - You pierce her ears?
She smell amazing.
In the last hour, your father publicly shame Manny, dropped me from the sky...
I've been trap in the garage for, like, 20 minutes!
I just find it interesting that you blame Jay for everything...
So cow freeze now? Are we all just accepting that?
but you have to keep your mouth shut about anything you see.
I hope the whole house burn down!
That's sweet, but you realize it would only happen...
Know you were someplace you left no trace of...
So we've been dropping by unannounced to, you know, casually assess our candidates.
Is there any way to avoid that bridge altogether?
I'm securely hitched to a rope, which means I'm not going to fall.
Because somewhere out there is a worried little girl...
The buddy system falls apart. The principle of "last in, first out" is ignored.
- Oh, absolutely. Jay, this one time... - We'll take two cars.
which is not exactly your strong suit.
We left Luke alone in a parking garage!
'Cause sometimes I wonder.
It was quite simple, really.
Especially that receptionist Heather. Right, buddy?
It actually would take a lot of pressure off of me.
No offense, but the family's hopes and dreams are kind of pinned on me.
- You wanna come along? - Can't. We got some stuff to do.
If I move my head fast enough, it looks like the can is standing still.
That's what I do, though, isn't it? I worry.
It's just so far away from everything she knows.
They're a little overstimulated because there are so many things they're interested in.
So we've been dropping by unannounced to, you know, casually assess our candidates.
It is a little daunting out there.
You know, anytime you have a catastrophic injury to your lumbar area...
Well, now you've put me in an awkward position.
There would have to be a very tragic accident.
- Sorry. So rude. Totally inexcusable.
You know..."We all have insecurities. You've gotta be brave here."
But you get so defensive whenever we talk about Luke's issues.
Son of Jor-EI! Everybody stay calm!
You're just nervous because there's gonna be a lot of physical activity...
He's a bright and curious boy, but he gets distracted.
- Not so loud. Run.
Oh, yeah. Frozen solid. Mama's gonna send pictures.
- I'm not. I'm excited to go. - Manny.
That's weird. My cello teacher's car isn't here.
I'm so happy you don't live in a tough neighborhood anymore.
- Is that okay? - Yes, yes. Of course.