Name: Halloween
Released: 2017-11-18
Cast: Sofía Vergara, Ed O'Neill, Julie Bowen

1) rosebush

but my hunch got stuck on a rosebush, and that's when I fell.
2) gargle

A bruja is a witch, and a gargle is a gargle.
3) louse

You look like a deer in head lice."
4) aah

Pow! For one final "aah!"
5) douche

a tool, a douche and me...
6) carpool

I have Manny in the carpool, and we're going to the dropout.
7) meltdown

after the meltdown I just had in there...
8) scarecrow

Can you tell Claire that I'm not really up for being a scarecrow?
9) dropout

No, the dropout, where you drop the kids in the school.
10) fang

Take those stupid fang out, Dale.
11) booze

Tell me it was booze, cheating, physical abuse... no problem.
12) disguise

It's "blessings in disguise."
13) pea

Sweet pea, I need to get down.
14) cracker

to order you some cracker and those cheeses that you like.
15) thigh

You had squeaky thigh. I lost a childhood.
16) pow

Pow! For one final "aah!"
17) bro

- Are you kidding? It's epic, bro. - Epic.
18) scare

The only person that costume scare is me.

1) bruja

A bruja is a witch, and a gargle is a gargle.
2) scare

He came out of nowhere, and he scare the baby cheeses out of me.
3) scream

And everyone was scream, "That's him! Get Quasimodo!"
4) usher

Kids get their candy. They are usher out.
5) dare

- and then Phil... - "Come in, if you dare."
6) punch

She punch me in the face!
7) mess

I can't. I already mess up once today, and I can't risk it.
8) trap

I'm trap in a men's room, and all I have on is the Spider-Man suit.
9) screw

- I'm screw. - Why don't you just tell Charlie the truth?
10) drag

I got drag into another meeting.
11) spare

I am sparing you an entire day...
12) suppose

Jerry's suppose to be our porch scarecrow.
13) realize

And before he even sees her, he realize he's fallen in love.
14) promise

- You promise? - Oh.
15) catch

Oh, one time she caught me staring off and she goes...
16) wet

And then the townspeople started chasing me and that's when I wet my pants!
17) lose

You had squeaky thighs. I lost a childhood.
18) happen

What happen that is so awful...

1) someday

- You know, what if someday that's us? - Honey...
2) altogether

And we skipped Alex altogether.
3) nowhere

He came out of nowhere, and he scared the baby cheeses out of me.
4) differently

running through all this in your head... what could you have done differently?
5) somewhere

I guess somewhere along the way...
6) personally

Unfortunately, Halloween was marred for me personally by an incident long ago.
7) apparently

But apparently, at this new company...
8) unfortunately

Unfortunately, Halloween was marred for me personally by an incident long ago.
9) exactly

There are exactly three people in costume here...
10) alone

about a guy eating in a diner, alone.
11) sometimes

sometimes people can't understand her.
12) especially

We love Halloween, especially Claire.
13) actually

It's actually a little hard for me to talk about.
14) fine

I know that I have an accent, but people understand me just fine.
15) inside

I should go back inside.
16) soon

which you may soon have plenty of time for.
17) enough

- It's not "vo-lump-tuous." - Okay, enough.
18) fast

- Honey? - Not so fast.

1) monogamous

I'm a monogamous social drinker, and Claire only sleep-hits me.
2) carpal

"Carpal tunnel syndrome" is not "carpool tunnel syndrome."
3) mediocre

Can I remind you you have one child who's not mediocre?
4) ironic

You know what's ironic?
5) disappointing

- I may have done that, sir. - That's disappointing.
6) spontaneous

- I could have been more spontaneous. - Uh-huh.
7) backwards

You can't just show up with a backwards baseball cap...
8) delightful

she stopped finding me delightful.
9) insane

Think she went insane. - She's not insane!
10) awful

No. I was in a costume all day. It was awful.
11) epic

- Are you kidding? It's epic, bro. - Epic.
12) calm

Calm down.
13) stuck

but you're kinda stuck with me.
14) fake

Nice fake hand.
15) weird

- This place is weird. - Yeah.
16) rough

of guys asking you if you have a rough tongue.
17) emotional

- I can't. It's too emotional. - Okay. Some other time.
18) tough

You know I'd be enjoying this more if Halloween wasn't such a tough day for me.

Modern Family » Season 2 » Halloween