New here? Create a new Account
Move to the previous cue
Move to the next cue
Increase size of captions
Decrease size of captions
Translate current cue
00:21:44
Josh Radnor, Jason Segel, Cobie Smulders
712
in the form of a 600 gigahertz superprocessing computer--
Nope. I hit the snooze button.
she played tennis, she liked old movies, her favorite food was lasagna,
Who knows? This feud goes so far back I can't remember who fired the first shot.
and I've stumbled into the beginning of a very scary campfire story.
It's Wendy the waitress. Tip her well. Thanks a lot, guys.
About a month ago, I started getting insomnia.
Probably some fracture. We got to get her to the hospital.
He wouldn't have understood. He's not exactly nervous about tying the knot.
Ever. Swear. Swear on the lives of your unborn boy and girl.
and every morning, he orders a sandwich from the deli downstairs.
Oh! Call an ambulance!
Binoculars. Second pair on my desk.
she played bass guitar, she did the Times crossword,
Well, except for the goat in my bathroom. Which is a great story.
You think that we should brush our teeth first?
and every morning, he orders a sandwich from the deli downstairs.
I don't have time to be creepy, dude. I have a lot of work to do.
and I've stumble into the beginning of a very scary campfire story.
We're kind of swamp.
I swear on Luke and Leia.
so he'd been intern for two months at Barney's firm...
I recruit you to be my executive mischief consultant.
No way. The last time I did this, the girl turned out to be engage.
That weird me out. And she plays bass guitar like Kim Deal from the Pixies.
I... I mean, this flat tire was a sign. I'm not suppose to do this.
I realize why I'm still single. I'm picky. I'm not going to settle.
Please. I bet it doesn't look that bad.
Will you taste this latte for me? I think they gave me decaf.
And was she okay about push it back?
but the geniuses at corporate decide they wanted to diversify, so...
She liked dogs, she spent her summers in North Carolina,
I don't understand. What happen to Ellen Pierce? Doesn't she run this place?
You wanted to see me, so I guess that means we're talking again?
Hello. May I speak with a Mr. Ted Mosby?
See, Marshall had always dream of using his law degree to protect the environment.
Kind of amazingly. Uh, she's 28, like me.
Luckily, there was still one person I could call to get a ride home.
You know, it's very rude to wear a hat indoors. I'm just saying.
And so, one $90 cab ride later, I was in the middle of nowhere.
Let me guess. It's somewhere far away.
"I want to look like a tiger," hence the hat.
Exactly. So I'm just going to wait for her to come to me.
Sometimes, even when you know something's a mistake,
call Lily, tell her you'll be home late.
Actually, my 30th birthday wasn't so bad.
in addition to probably being kind of healthy.
But I'll get to that later.
Who knows? This feud goes so far back I can't remember who fired the first shot.
Never. What else?
You signed up for our services about six months ago.
Uh, excuse me, has anyone ever told y...
See, Marshall had always dreamed of using his law degree to protect the environment.
You know, the more I watch this, the less convinced I am
Ever. Swear. Swear on the lives of your unborn boy and girl.
You don't have to. Please, it's going to be embarrassing
Let's make that bastard pay.
She's into sports, but not so much so that her legs are, like, more muscular than mine.
Oh...! These pancakes are delightful.
You know, it's very rude to wear a hat indoors. I'm just saying.
He's still sound asleep.
Even really really dumb mistakes.
I'm sure you could find a program here that's just as selective.
and then all of a sudden,
He wouldn't have understood. He's not exactly nervous about tying the knot.
I was so excited, I got there early.
All right, you've clearly had a rough night.
Careful. The plate is very hot.
Attractive, college-educated, she wants two kids-- a boy and a girl...
This is stupid.
- Is she okay? - I'm serious, call 911.
Don't think I'm overlooking the obvious fact that I should just be mad at you.