Name: The Papal Chase
Released: 2016-11-17
Cast: H. Jon Benjamin, Judy Greer, Amber Nash

1) halberdsman

Oh, right, right. Halberdsmen are foot soldiers.
2) camorra

The camorra is like your Mafia, like--
3) cassock

Oh, blow it out your cassock. MALORY: Ron!
4) halberd

I thought they just had halberd. Do you at least have a sidearm?
5) oof

I wouldn't argue with a-- Oof!
6) papacy

LANA: He wouldn't, by any chance, be next in line for the papacy, would he?
7) smudge

Well, there would be an election. Right. With the smudge pot.
8) android

No, I-- Bishop the android from Aliens?
9) cetera

Et cetera, et cetera.
10) jester

I think we can handle a few court jester with, whatever, halberds.
11) gasp

[GASPS, THEN SPEAKS ITALIAN]
12) embarrassment

Good. Saves you the embarrassment of an incredibly homophobic remark.
13) pun

Shit, I had a pun about ﬂares.
14) broom

Why don't I shove a broom up my ass and sweep the floor?
15) assassin

Assassins plan to kill the Holy Father in his own bed on this very night.
16) nun

Heh. What, they don't have black nun?
17) nerd

Well, sorry, I don't have your language nerd skills.
18) faction

Something about a faction of the Swiss Guard

1) apprehend

Ah. So the good news is, my men have apprehend Cardinal Corelli...
2) assassinate

Who told you I was to be assassinate?
3) asshole

You asshole. Was he crushed?
4) crush

Oh, my God, you crush the pope?
5) remind

I'll tell you what we should be doing. So who does the pope remind you of?
6) fog

What the hell are you doing? PAM: Gonna see if his breath fog it up.
7) grab

Think I might have grab the tail of the dragon here.
8) quit

Goddamn it, quit telling me what to do. I'm the goddamn agent in command.
9) shut

And you, also shut up. Yes, sir.
10) realize

Which you realize are just ceremonial.
11) wake

Heh. Until he wake up and sees me staring at him...
12) promise

...promise you'll never tell Mother. Okay, I promise.
13) assume

...and I assume you're not sending Ray--
14) explain

I guess that explain that.
15) guess

I guess that explains that.
16) wear

Why are they wear Swiss Guard uniforms, driving a Swiss Guard car?
17) drop

Figo. He really drop the GD bombs.
18) walk

You were speaking Latin when you walk in here.

1) technically

Although, technically, I think they're called voulges.
2) incredibly

Good. Saves you the embarrassment of an incredibly homophobic remark.
3) literally

...with night vision goggles and literally pisses himself.
4) somehow

Somehow, this is all your fault.
5) obviously

I-- Whatever. Look, obviously there's--
6) apart

However, we cannot tell these two apart.
7) possibly

LANA: What else could she possibly mean?
8) absolutely

We absolutely do not call it the old switcheroo.
9) truly

But even if you were prepared-- Which I truly feel that I am.
10) immediately

...who immediately confessed to the plot. Hey, hey, that is good news.
11) actually

I actually do not promise I won't get mad. Because here's what thing?
12) inside

I assume you have a plan once inside?
13) though

PAM: Wrong X-Man, dumb-ass. Still, though.
14) fast

Move, idiot. I'm going as fast as I can.
15) else

LANA: What else could she possibly mean?
16) ago

...then tell Rodney they need travel documents an hour ago.
17) ever

...who ever made me regret taking the holy orders.
18) least

I thought they just had halberds. Do you at least have a sidearm?

1) unspeakable

Did the unspeakable happen to your slender, hairless, adolescent body?
2) underrated

I was gonna say "underrated" but--
3) ceremonial

Obviously they're ceremonial, Lana. They were made obsolete by the arquebus.
4) slender

Did the unspeakable happen to your slender, hairless, adolescent body?
5) undercover

Lana, it's an undercover mission. At the Vatican?
6) mortal

La sacra Bibbia says it is a mortal sin.
7) obsolete

Obviously they're ceremonial, Lana. They were made obsolete by the arquebus.
8) asleep

That's how Woodhouse looks when he's asleep.
9) inadequate

...which, by the way, was grossly-- Inadequate preparation...
10) dumb

PAM: Wrong X-Man, dumb-ass. Still, though.
11) adolescent

Did the unspeakable happen to your slender, hairless, adolescent body?
12) grateful

For which we are grateful.
13) fake

Fake dynamite? That's your plan?
14) damn

Fine. I'll buy a damn indulgence. Oh, wait.
15) stupid

Put the stupid mirror back. He's not-- PAM: Ah!
16) alive

But get me out of here alive and I will pardon you for it, my son.
17) mad

Here's the thing-- Promise you won't get mad?
18) catholic

To the Vatican? You think all those Catholic priests wouldn't peg him...

Archer » Season 4 » The Papal Chase