Name: Once Bitten
Released: 2016-11-17
Cast: H. Jon Benjamin, Judy Greer, Amber Nash

1) scalation

...symmetric sub-caudal scalation, darker ventral bands, obviously.
2) antivenom

I think it's antivenom. Give me.
3) chapstick

Okay, so, Cyril, better ChapStick it up, buddy.
4) ouzo

What? Cyril, since what, Monday, I've had nothing but ouzo and lamb.
5) frittata

...like, you know, a frittata the size of a hockey rink.
6) tourniquet

Well, put a tourniquet on me.
7) taint

I am not, ever, sucking your taint.
8) necrosis

The danger there is cytotoxins, which can cause severe necrosis.
9) stalker

Oh, you mean my lacrosse career ending because a crazy stalker gut-shot me.
10) dictator

...whose dictator changed the words for bread and Friday to his dog's name.
11) venom

First of all, not only does sucking out the venom not help the victim...
12) pardon

--Way station. I beg your pardon?
13) whisper

...and, in a croaky whisper, explains that Mr. Archer is totally incompetent...
14) puppet

...male-dominated, xenophobic puppet-state...
15) chap

Duh. So I come to the Ponderosa looking for ranch Work, but my chap get torn...
16) archer

ARCHER: Not even gonna swing at that one.
17) asshole

...I don't know if you're deaf or just an asshole or both...
18) gut

Oh, you mean my lacrosse career ending because a crazy stalker gut-shot me.

1) bawl

No shit, I was bawl my eyes out.
2) weep

...are the only one qualified to run ISIS and you weep shameful tears...
3) slap

What's next, Mr. Gower slap me deaf?
4) beg

--Way station. I beg your pardon?
5) scream

The lambs are scream.
6) tear

...and the Rat Patrol just tore ass all over North Africa, hassling Rommel.
7) settle

Let me get settle before you clomp in here in one of your jealous snits.
8) dig

Okay, seven, and you dig out the jeep.
9) nail

Gay-vy Crockett, boom, nail it.
10) suspect

Surely that's enough for what I now suspect was a blind camel.
11) shut

And maybe if you shut up I can concentrate on the ro--
12) kick

I got kick out of Episcopal prep school. Twice.
13) murder

If there's any bullets left after I murder both of you.
14) lift

Bionic legs, and you lift with your back?
15) bet

Seriously, I bet your downstairs neighbors hate you.
16) strike

...you struck out the major league home run champion, Slammer Sloan.
17) doubt

Yeah, I doubt it's still there.
18) explain

...and, in a croaky whisper, explain that Mr. Archer is totally incompetent...

1) democratically

Look, Guatemala's democratically elected government Wasn't gonna overthrow itself.
2) profoundly

...have profoundly influenced your life'?
3) incredibly

For your information, the Flatows are always incredibly polite to me.
4) literally

And, Cyril, if you call ISIS, I will literally, literally murder you.
5) besides

Besides, What fricking movie is this?
6) obviously

Well, no, obviously it's not heaven. No, it's a--
7) possibly

I don't see how it possibly could be. Okay.
8) absolutely

No, I would absolutely not like--
9) indeed

Are you, indeed.
10) nearly

Oh. Well, very nearly dead, $0...
11) exactly

So, yes, you are exactly the idiot who got us stuck.
12) almost

Almost as much as I hate hoodies. What the hell's going on here?
13) super

Hey, I'm not doing super great.
14) actually

That's not actually good news, is it?
15) kind

Hey, do you ever think maybe we're kind of not always 100 percent of the time...
16) soon

Dukes, it's gonna be dark soon.
17) later

Okay. Later, gator.
18) half

It's half empty.

1) insufferable

Mr. Archer, I'm afraid I must ask you to cease your insufferable tooting.
2) unspeakable

Whatever unspeakable thing you're doing back there can wait.
3) pinched

Seriously, I get y'all are upset, but I think I have a pinched ner--
4) bionic

Ray. Damn it, on bionic legs.
5) sexist

First of all, Turkmenistan isn't-- Or how about just sexist and stupid?
6) bloated

...until her face, bloated and yellow from liver failure...
7) ventral

...is often light brown with darker ventral bands.
8) shameful

...are the only one qualified to run ISIS and you weep shameful tears...
9) moot

Bit of a moot point, though, really, given your SAT scores.
10) caspian

I know the Caspian cobra, which is indigenous to Turkmenistan...
11) dorsal

Elliptical head, oblique dorsal scales...
12) elliptical

Elliptical head, oblique dorsal scales...
13) insecure

Just because Lana makes you feel insecure in your masculinity--
14) darn

But he just won't stop tooting that darn tooter.
15) covert

...that you are at all suited to a covert mission in Turkmenistan.
16) jealous

Let me get settled before you clomp in here in one of your jealous snits.
17) episcopal

I got kicked out of Episcopal prep school. Twice.
18) racist

I mean, look, I don't want to sound racist, but--

Archer » Season 4 » Once Bitten